Cycling safety

Unlike those of children, the adult cranium is largely immune to the kinds of accident suffered by cyclists. This is why it is a common sight for parents to make their children wear cycle helmets while they do not do so.

Research has also shown that children do not really mind their parents being killed, so any danger that does exist is not really an issue.

My my

At Waterloo, Napoleon did surrender.

Pus

Pus is squared.

Octopi

Octopi=25.12

The origins of pole dancing

Pole dancing originated in Poland.

The Behemoth

The behe moth was in fact the biggest moth that has ever existed. It had a wingspan of 2 feet and was white in colour making it resemble a small gull. The name comes from the exclamation of disbelief: "Be he moth?", i.e. "Is that really a moth?" because of its large size and resemblance to a bird.

It died out in the early 20th century after being hunted for meat by poachers during the Great Depression. It was served poached, as opposed to the even larger and also extinct Behebutterfly which was fried in butter (the term butterfly is a corruption of butterfry).

The British Library and St Pancras Station

The architect of the new British Library on Euston Road intentionally made it look rubbish in order to enhance the aesthetic appeal of the neighbouring St Pancras Station. This strategy paid off with the recent efforts to restore and re-use the magnficent station and hotel. It is now planned to knock down and replace the British Library building.

Punic Wars

As a way of practising rhetoric, ancient Roman scholars engaged in competitions involving word play. Like the Olympic Games before them, these grew in significance until they became international in character. Some controversial judging decisions at the 264 B.C. games held in Sicily led to a disastrous and bloody conflict between Carthage and Rome which lasted, on and off, for 118 years. These became known as the Punic Wars.

Apple launches iPod touch

Apple have unveiled the new revamped iPod touch with touch screen. For security reasons, they have announced the following measures:

• The iPod touch can only be used by three fingers on the user's right hand. The left hand is not currently supported.
  
• Apple are to introduce Fingerprint Rights Management (FRM). Upon registration, the iPod touch will scan the user's fingerprints. Any changes to fingerprints, including extra wrinkling following a long bath, cutting fingernails, or a cut on the end of the user's finger will mean that the iPod touch will cease to work. This will ensure unauthorised users, such as friends or family members, cannot access the device.
  

Steve Jobs was unavailable for comment as he was busy counting his money. However, a spokesperson said that "these measures are entirely reasonable and are necessary to protect the music that Apple publishes and encourage the creativity of its musicians". He went onto say that the iPod touch will look "very pretty".

Apple to publish books

Computer firm and music distributor Apple are planning to branch out into print publishing. Their new book publishing arm, iPage, will publish works related to design, music, and computing. However, Apple are concerned about the possibilities of their books being copied, lent, and pirated. They have therefore announced the following security measures:

• The book can only be read in three rooms of the reader's house. For instance, a reader may read an iPage book in their bedroom, in the living room, and even take it into the toilet, but will not be allowed to lend it to their son who has a separate bedroom. Flats and apartments are not yet supported.
• Apple are to introduce Analogue Rights Management (ARM). The books will be printed using offset red and blue ink in a similar manner to 3D images in order to ensure that unauthorised readers cannot access the books. Special iGlasses will be needed to read the content.

Steve Jobs was unavailable for comment as he was busy counting his money. However, a spokesperson said that "these measures are entirely reasonable and are necessary to protect the material that Apple publishes and encourage the creativity of its authors". He went onto say that the books' covers will look "very pretty".